Rosie and I will be going to Gatlinburg for our annual trek to the Gaither Homecoming’ Family Fest in the Smokies.We have went 6 years.
Always have fun… but I will have anxiety and worries all week leading up to it. Once there I will be fine.Except by late Saturday I will be bawling my eyes out of loneliness cause I see so many COUPLES sharing lives with one another. LONELINESS SUCKS!
Rosie and I have stayed in the same hotel room for 4 years now. We can walk from our room to the venue in 5 minutes.
Worried about the weather… suppose to be in the 90′s. Rosie and I do NOT tolerate heat well. Plans are to go to the shows, grab a bite to eat and then back to the room for a nap. Going to shop late at night.
Dyed Rosie’s hair BRIGHT RED, Gonna tone it down tomorrow. She also wants me give her some bangs. ADVICE: Do NOT use L’Oreal Excellence HiColor Intense Red on your eyebrows. Color is way too intense. Have to dye Rosie’s eyebrows a darker shade.
Dyed my hair Natural blue black. Dyed my brows as well. Looks good.
Rosie and I went through all our jewelry, make-up and hair stuff. We have so so many accessories…. Hard to select what to take with us to Gatlinburg. Rosie and I are spoiled rotten!
Rosie is still having major edema in her legs. Pray that it subsides.
Rosie has lost about 50% of her hair due to having 3 major surgeries in the last 9 months. Please pray for her. I know it upsets her. THANKS!
Went to the Mall. Belks, Kohls, Sally Beauty, and Ross for Less. Hobby Lobby.
Physical therapy with Rosie.
Had 2 hot flash episodes today. They really knackered me.
Gonna recoup tomorrow and decide what to do on Saturday and Sunday.
I received so many compliments today. Wore a long dress Oriental Style. Paisley. EVERYONE LOVED IT and could NOT believe I got it at the Great Smokies Flea Market for EIGHT BUCKS! Brand New! Wore my Hair up. Bettie Page Bangs. Make-up was glam. Daddy even told me and Rosie how beautiful we looked and he was proud to have daughters that dress to the nines when they go out! I LOVE MY DADDY!
Wish I had Special events where I could REALLY get dolled up. I have so many lovely PARTY dresses. Elegant. Will wear some of them next weekend when Rosie and I make our annual Trek to Gaither’s Homecoming FAMILY FEST IN THE SMOKIES in Gatlinburg. 3 DAYS of Wonderful southern gospel and bluegrass singing, comedians and motivational speakers. Get to see Ken Davis AGAIN. Love him. Plus get to see Ian Cron for the 1st time. PLUS:
I UNDERLINED MY FAVES:
Gaither Vocal Band Wes Hampton David Phelps Bill Gaither Michael English Mark Lowry
I will probably wear a lot of retro pin-up type clothes and hairstyles. They went over well last year. Had men asking to have their picture taken with me. So Flattering.
I am going to get my first MANICURE in a salon next week. I know I want gel tips and polish.. not sure if I am gonna go french style or red polish or black polish. Doing my own pedicure since I am a diabetic and would rather do them myself for safety reasons. Gotta be careful with my feet.
I actually have a light tan from using the Jergens Natural Glow. Thank God… I am no longer ivory. More like I have a peaches and cream complexion now.
Hope everyone has an awesome Friday and Weekend.
Much love to John, Shane, Carmen, Terri,Rebecca, Sheri, and Rick. Thanks for your supprt and friendship.
First, we survived being born to mothers who smoked and/or drank while they carried us.
They took aspirin, ate blue cheese dressing, tuna from a can, and didn’t get tested for diabetes.
Then after that trauma, our baby cribs were covered with bright colored lead-based paints.
We had no child proof lids on medicine bottles, doors or cabinets and when we rode our bikes, we had no helmets, not to mention, the risks we took hitchhiking.
As children, we would ride in cars with no seat belts or air bags. Riding in the back of a pick-up on a warm day was always a special treat.
We drank water from the garden hose and NOT from a bottle.
We shared one soft drink with four friends, from one bottle and NO ONE actually died from this.
We ate cupcakes, white bread and real butter and drank soda pop with sugar in it, but we weren’t overweight because……
WE WERE ALWAYS OUTSIDE PLAYING!!
We would leave home in the morning and play all day, as long as we were back when the street lights came on. No one was able to reach us all day. And we were O.K.
We would spend hours building our go-carts out of scraps and then ride down the hill, only to find out we forgot the brakes. After running into the bushes a few times, we learned to solve the problem.
We did not have Pay-stations, Nintendo’s, X-boxes, no video games at all, no 99 channels on cable, no video tape movies, no surround-sound, no cell phones, no personal computers, no Internet or Internet chat rooms……….
WE HAD FRIENDS and we went outside and found them!
We fell out of trees, got cut, broke bones and teeth and there were no lawsuits from these accidents.
We ate worms and mud pies made from dirt, and the worms did not live in us forever.
We were given BB guns for our 10th birthdays,
We made up games with sticks and tennis balls and although we were told it would happen, we did not put out very many eyes.
We rode bikes or walked to a friend’s house and knocked on the door or rang the bell, or just yelled for them!
Little League had try outs and not everyone made the team. Those who didn’t had to learn to deal with disappointment. Imagine that!!
The idea of a parent bailing us out if we broke the law was unheard of. They actually sided with the law!
This generation has produced some of the best risk-takers, problem solvers and inventors ever!
The past 50 years have been an explosion of innovation and new ideas.
We had freedom, failure, success and responsibility, and we learned HOW TO DEAL WITH IT ALL!
Having a nice peaceful time at home this evening… thanks to xanax.
I have Snickers (Dachshund) and Tater (Ginger Tabby Cat) in my Lazy-Boy chair with me. So warm and cozy.
John never made it to chat. He worked very late last night. Probably did the same tonight. Hope he is sleeping well.
Seems like I have done something to upset one of my Nashville Buddies. I am prolly bothering them too much. All I wanted from them was support and friendship.
I have crushes on so many different men.
Most are not worthy of the Goddess I am!
Some famous: Russell Brand, Tyler Perry, Bret Michaels, Stephen Fry, All the guys on GCB! I have eclectic tastes.
Some not so famous… for now they shall not be disclosed.
To all the men I have crushes on… I would follow you to the end of the Milky Way just to see your smile, hear your voice & to touch your face.
I am looking to make friends with men within 250 miles of me. All the men I have been interested in and whom I have befriended online over the past 10 years have been at least 1000 miles away. So scared of getting close to a man. So I make sure they DO NOT LIVE CLOSE BY.
The Only men I have given my phone number to was a Man in the Netherlands, One in London, and 2 in Scotland.
I adore men who are family oriented, compassionate, humorous, down to earth, love pets, music, movies, traveling and must have the same values as me.
GOD IS LOVE AND WE ALL WERE CREATED EQUAL.
Not into any particular body types, nor facial features, nor eye colors, nor hair colors, nor color of skin. I am an equal opportunity employer. LOL
I married a pauper, loved a Taco Bell Fry Cook, and dated a Millionaire.
All I need now is someone who can take care of me and Rosie financially… who will love and adore me for the rest of my life.
In all my dating experiences,I have only had a man pay for my dinner twice. Normally my Mom and Dad picked up the tab. I don’t feel right when a man pays for my dinner. Don’t know why. Just makes me feel weird. I won’t even ask a man to buy me even a bottle of water. Not a gold digger at all.
I have never had a man come and pick me up and take me out to dinner alone. Never. Always been with family or the men brought their friends to the dinner. I did have a Honeymoon Dinner alone with Hager at Pizza Hut but Rosie paid… My Parents drove us to the motel and left us. Hager didn’t even own a car. Pizza Hut was across from the motel. Hager even called me by another woman’s name that night while taking my virginity. He went out for coffee and I did not think he would return. He did. We were married 21 days prior to me filing for divorce. Hager told me he didn’t love me and only married me for my virginity. What an ASS!
JUST once before I turn 50, I would love for a man to show up at my door, with a bouquet of wild flowers, go to dinner and a movie. I WOULD LOVE THAT and appreciate it more than anyone knows. Just small things.
I swear I think I am mentally stuck with social skills of a child around 7-14. The years I was sexually molested.
I would do anything for a hug right now.
Scared and Lonely.
At times I think I am meant to be unhappy and alone forever.
Yet, I do at times feel like I have been SAVED for a very special man.
17.5 years of Chasity. Purity. That is so rare these days. Most 17 year olds are not even celibate.
Asking God to grant me self-esteem, improve my social skills, and to allow me to let a man get close to me.
I know I could have a new guy to date each night of the year. I have so many men approach me online. So many that I don’t have a clue who to start a friendship with.
I pray that the therapist I start seeing on the 24th can help me deal with things that has transpired in my life. Help me overcome my lack of social skills.
JESUS HELP ME LIVE.
~Angela Bell Goode
PS I will be thrilled if one on my secret crushes read this.
Looks like we may have to once again postpone our trip to visit family in West Virginia. We have to get Rosie HEALTHY first!
Rosie had been off blood thinner for a few days while she had her colonoscopy. She is back on it…. BUT being off it has made the blood clot in her left leg swell up. It is so painful. Hate seeing her cry in pain.
Her tummy is doing better at times.. but she still feels like crap. Poor sissy.
I have an appt with our family Doctor tomorrow and Rosie has one for Wednesday. I made my appt last week. Rosie just called today to schedule hers. Receptionist said he could NOT see the both of us BUT we will see. Will let Rosie see him if he can’t see us both.
Had a pleasant webcam chat with John from Scotland. He is a wonderful compassionate man. I love him.
Dyed Rosie’s hair copper red. Have to wait till it dries to see what shade her ends are. May be adding additional dye to it later this week.
Trimmed both of our hair.
Organized most of our extensive make-up collections. Still need to do a lil more tonight.
I tried Jergens Glow Sunless Tanner GLOW and moisturizer today. It is my 1st foray into sunless tanners. Only did my legs. Will do the rest of my body in a few days after I see IF I like the results.
Going watch some TV with Rosie and go to bed early. I am knackered.
Rosie and I went out to grocery shop after taking the boys for a drive through the countryside. Rosie got ill in the store and we had to leave. Diarrhea and vomiting. Believe me I have done nothing but clean up both ever since she had gastric bypass surgery on 7-24-11. She also had major cramping below her navel region. Wanted to take her to the ER but she wanted to come home and let me clean her up first. Well, we did that. She had no fever and decided to wait till tomorrow. We have been to the ParkWest Hospital ER 5 times since 7-24-11 with her having nausea, vomiting and diarrhea. Took 3 ER visits to get them to admit her. Finally got an ER doc that would listen!!!!!
She had MAJOR case of MRSA abscesses in her stomach and spent 21 days in the hospital. The Last visit was 10 days ago…..her vitals, ct scan and labs were normal. They couldn’t do complete labs since she is a difficult stick. They SHOULD HAVE tried more times than they did. UGH!
She’s had 2 hernia repairs since GBS “Gastric Bypass Surgery” One in August 2011 and another in Feb 2012. After the most recent repair she got SEVERE DIARRHEA! I should know since I am her caregiver and it has been BAD! YUCK. She has had NO APPETITE since GBS. Was on TPN Feedings for 2 months. She has not ate a handful of food in weeks. She is weak. Has significant bruising on her body. I am sure she is dehydrated and malnourished.
We are heading to University of Tennessee Emergency Room tomorrow and NOT Parkwest Hospital.
Rosie NOW has a fever of 100.6. Giving her a Tylenol.
I just pray that we get a good ER doc who will investigate all her issues she is having.
I am taking enough clothes and toiletries for a few weeks. Sure they will admit her. Dad is gonna MAKE THEM! She is obviously sick. She has lost over 200 lbs in 13 months! Just so scared and worried about her. Stressed out to the max. All she has ate today is 1 1/2 deli thin ham slices and 1/2 slice of cheese. She has only drank about 20 OZ of fluids. Just not able to drink or eat much.
PRAISE GOD for all my friends in Scotland, Tennessee, and Texas. Don’t know what I would do without you. You all are a blessing. So glad I took a chance and decided to befriend all of you. You are GOOD PEOPLE!
My heart is beating too fast. Lump in my throat. UGH. Trying to relax.
Rosie took her phenergan and will soon be asleep. As soon as I know she is sound asleep I am going go to bed. EXHAUSTED.
Dad, Rosie, The Boys and I went to the Great Smokies Flea Market today. We took the Boys pet stroller which they both USED to fit in…. Snickers has grown so big that it was a tight fit. So Rosie bought a pet stroller than holds 4 small pets. Ended up selling the old Stroller to a lady for $20… she was thrilled to get it. It was a bargain. New stroller was $86
Rosie bought the boys new harnesses to go with the new collars she got earlier this week. So Snazzy!
Picked up some $1 jewelry items. I bought a long dress for $8 brand new. Rosie got her one as well.
Rosie woke up this morn and started vomiting as soon as she took her meds. Had nausea off and on all day. She fell asleep about an hour ago. Hope she wakes up feeling better.
Went to Capt. Gallery in Dandridge for Dinner. Rosie and I split the Ribeye, Jumbo Shrimp, Fried Zucchini and Salad. We have enough ribeye leftover to feed us both supper tomorrow. I also have some fried zucchini left over. YUM! Was gonna order some clam chowder but forgot to. Thank God.. I couldn’t have ate it. Was stuffed.
SnickerDoodle has been so protective of me this evening. Will not allow Smoki to come near me. Growling at him. Not sure why.
Need to find a dentist. Need a good cleaning and perhaps a filling. Want one closer to us than Dr. Frankie office.
Had a panic attack or hot flash… at the flea market. Was drenched head to toe with sweat for almost an hour. Skin was flushed. HATE IT.
Got home and my face is puffy. Wasn’t when I left. Not sure… but I bet it is allergy related.
Thinking about cutting bangs again. Not sure.
John adored my hair tonight. I rolled it with 1″ velcro rollers. Used tons of ‘em. Looked so feathery and shiny.
Rosie is craving an Hawaiian Ice so we are going on an excursion to find one tomorrow. Wish us luck.
Had issues with my balance today. Almost fell flat on my butt twice today. Just unsteady. Really need to get an injection in my right hip as Doc Kouser wanted to do.
SO HAPPY for my friends in Nashville. Good things are heading their way. Movie is being made by Universal based on their lives. INSPIRATIONAL! Blessed to have them in my life. I love em all. Hope that one day we can meet one another.
Just realized I haven’t taken my meds tonight.. Oops… BRB. Took em.
I haven’t taken my vitamins/minerals/supplements in a week or so. Gonna start back.
Also I have been naughty…. Been consuming way more carbs that I should. Makes me feel sluggish. I should know better but Carbs are so comforting to me.
Will prolly be going to West Virginia on Friday. Hope the large handicapped cabin at Twin Falls State Park is available. May have to change the day we go. We LOVE that cabin cause so many of our WV family can stay with us. :-)
Having aches and pains. May have to increase my dosage on my pain meds back to what the doc wants me to take. Tried to lower them and OUCH!
Dad was in a great mood this afternoon. Thank God cause sometimes he is the grouchiest old man on earth. Dad attracts so many women. Always trying to pick him up. He does NOT look 71 at all. Still has all his hair and he is indeed handsome. HE DOES NOT WANT TO DATE ANYONE.
I do want to date YET I get no dudes trying to pick me up. NONE. Only man who has come up to me and asked me out was the man (Hager) that I married. Rest of the men I dated were through personal newspaper ads.Men may be interested in me and I am just tooo dumb and socially inept that I don’t recognize it. Ooops… One other man asked me out at church in 1991. He didn’t have a car nor a job so I politely declined.
I don’t go anywhere without Rosie. Only time I have been apart was during hospitalizations. Maybe 3-4 times I was gone for a few hours with Hager. I did spend 3 over night trips at Gary’s (aka WV Millionaire dude) house
The only time I ever went on a date ALONE with a man was my honeymoon night… Always had Rosie or they brought their friends along. I would love to have a man pick me up, bring me flowers and take me out just for dinner. Just Dinner is all I ask.
Only one man has sent me flowers and that was Steven Bryant Ward aka Poison98. I met him through a Poison Chat Room that he hosted. He and I had a cyber which progressed to a phone relationship for almost a year. We had planned on him flying in from Tulsa, Oklahoma to West Virginia to meet and he backed out the week we was coming to meet me. We ended up staying together for a few months after that. He sent me flowers for my birthday. I am a December babe and the flowers were sent in a unique green globe ornament vase. Still have it in my bedroom.
Goodness, I have missed out on so much in my life…. It is time for that to change!
I know I have a few men who reads my journal often. One is The Actor, Game Show Host, Mr Intelligence himself Stephen Fry! http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stephen_Fry He says he is 90% gay and 10% straight. I have written him a few naughty PRIVATE (you have to follow one another to send PRIVATE messages on Twitter) flirtatious tweets and he always replies. I love an intelligent man who knows who he is and stands up for what he believes in… way more than a handsome one. But I do admire a handsome warm heart and soul.
I know that some awesome things are about to transpire in my life. Excited. Lord, I surrender prepare me for all the new adventures I am about to undertake!
We are gonna take the Boys: Smoki Poki Loki (Carin Terrier aka Toto dog) and SnickerDoodle Bug (Miniature long haired dachshund) for a Sunday drive through the country side. We have taken Sunday drives for as long as I can remember. So relaxing. Love to admire all the glorious beauty God has created. Well it is relaxing until Smoki sees cows, deers, goats. horses, rabbits, etc. Then all heck breaks lose. He goes nuts. Barking. UGH! But what is even worse is when it is raining and we have the windshield wipers on… Smoki dives into the dashboard after them. UGH! And I am even holding him and his leash! Snickers and Smoki enjoyed having the window down today….As Bret Michaels wrote, “RIDE THE WIND, Never coming back till I touch the midnight sun.” I sing that to the Boys and they go bonkers cause they know I am about to roll down the window!
Asking the Lord Jesus Christ to help me SAY NO TO CARBS! Praying for energy to do more things. Chronic fatigue is debilitating. UGH. I am gonna do at least 30 min of household chores daily. Asking God for the willpower to do more things without pain and to control my appetite. I SURRENDER.
My cousin Brandy found 6 puppies dropped off on a country road in WV. They are so cute. She is keeping one and going to find homes for the others. Pray they all received loving homes. Looks like part German Shepherd.
When 9-11-01 happened I was seeing a psychiatrist prior to it happening. It was so difficult to deal with. A few months after it happened My shrink made me promise not to read or watch news about it. Still upsetting to me. Now all these tornadoes, hurricanes, natural [...]
Rosie is not feeling well. She attempted to sit up on the side of her bed this evening and started crying in pain. Poor Sissy. She has been up in her chair twice today. As expected, transferring from her wheelchair to bed is very painful to her. She was just too sore to get up. Mainly it is her right side which wrecks havoc upon movement.
She has not had a bowel movement in days, which is normal after gastric bypass. Was told to take M.O.M. aka milk of magnesia. She has had a few bowel movements.
She drank one ounce of protein shake about 20 min ago and within 10 min she was puking it up. Just 5 min after her health aide Peggy left at 11.
Rosie’s health aide Dina will be here at 1-3 tomorrow. Peggy will be here from 3 to 11 again. May have to request additional respite care for Sunday but for now none is planned. Regular (non-respite) appointment’s are on Mon, Wed, Fridays for 90 min to 150 min. They give Rosie baths, washes her hair, changes her bedding, cooks, do dishes, and minor lil things like that for her. They have helped alleviate some of my stress. The health aides have been coming for almost a year. Prior to that I did it all. Rosie, Dad, and I adore Peggy and Dina both. They are now family. :-)
I pray that the pain and gastric distress subsides. Gonna call Rosie’s nurse at Dr Boyce’s, if it doesn’t get better soon. Rosie paid $3000.00 CASH for emergency nurse assistance, nutrition classes, etc. that Dr Boyce REQUIRES!
Rosie is still experiencing pain. Ugh…
I slept ONLY 3 hours last night…NOT STRAIGHT… and then I napped for an hour today. Rosie woke me every hour or so to urinate last night. She normally can do it without assistance but is too sore from her Gastric Bypass Surgery (7-26-2011) to do it alone. She can get the bed pan under her but since surgery needs help to remove it.
Thank God for My John. He has been such a blessing. Poor thing didn’t sleep while Rosie and I were at the hospital. He is a wonderful man and my best buddy.
I am wore out. Gonna hopefully get to bed in a few hours.
I love my sissy and pray that she starts feeling better.
I am only taking Victoza… back down from 1.2 to .6 since I have been going too low.
I was on 4 Glipizide daily.. Now on only 1 of them.
No INSULIN at all.
HURRAH! Victory. WINNING!
My current sugar reading is 106! Wow! 70-120 is normal.
I still get all the symptoms of going hypo when it gets under 120. I am use to it staying around 200 all the time…. even when I was on insulin.
WEIGHT: I don’t think the scale I have here is accurate. So I am NOT weighing myself till I see Dr Melling on Thursday. Last time I saw him I was around 224… I think… hard to remember. I know I am much lower than that now. I hope to weigh less than 215 when I do get weighed. I will be thrilled…..AND If I am under 210, I plan on celebrating with a Banana Split… I wish!
I am so shaky right now. Gonna eat a protein bar, and then go to bed.