Hot Men: PHOTO: Channing Tatum, Matthew McConaughey, Matt Bomer, and Joe Manganiello do a little striptease for the July 2012 cover of Entertainment Weekly.
Ke$ha, Naya Rivera, and Katharine McPhee have all been seen sporting 1930s-era finger-waved looks.
Chanteuse Lana Del Rey looked perfectly lovely in her Alberta Ferretti gown, but the real attention-grabber was her 18-karat white gold necklace, which featured a 31-carat yellow pear-shaped diamond drop. That's quite the rock.
Berenice Bejo Actress Berenice Bejo of The Artist was picture perfect in bright red Louis Vuitton accented with Chopard jewels. Classic RED Dress.
WEIRD FASHION: Elena Lenina is a Russian model/author who appeared on a French reality television show in 2003
Lady GaGa @ Narita International Airport on Wednesday (May 16) in Tokyo, Japan.
Nicole Scherzinger, UK premiere of Men in Black 3 on Wednesday (May 16) at Odeon Leicester Square in London, England.
Jennifer Morrison
Brooklyn Decker glams it up for a feature in Vanity Fairs June 2012 issue
Brooklyn Decker glams it up for a feature in Vanity Fairs June 2012 issue
Brooklyn Decker glams it up for a feature in Vanity Fairs June 2012 issue
Brooklyn Decker glams it up for a feature in Vanity Fairs June 2012 issue
Ricky Martin
Diane Kruger poses at the 2012 Cannes Film Festival‘s jury photo call held at Palais des Festivals on Wednesday (May 16) in Cannes, France.
Eva Longoria. Cannes
Jane Fonda> Cannes
Diane Kruger,. Palais des Festivals on Wednesday (May 16) in Cannes
Freida Pinto. Palais des Festivals on Wednesday (May 16) in Cannes
Janet Jackson
Billy Ray Cyrus: Milk Campaign Ad
Brevard Zoo! The zoo welcomes its first Saki monkey baybay into the fold on April 20th. The cute female babe is mama Chuckie's first child as well.
PHOTO: Bruce Willis poses at the Moonrise Kingdom photo call held during the 2012 Cannes Film Festival at Palais des Festival on Wednesday (May 16) in Cannes, France.
See what your friends are reading Shared with friends Settings Roach In McDonald's Hash Browns: Man Finds Deep-Fried Bug Mealbreaker (n.): a nasty, non-edible surprise found in food while it is being eaten; often lawsuit-provoking, sometimes fabricated, always disgusting.
Princess Kate Middleton BRAIDED UP-DO
Elizabeth Taylor and Michael Todd. Fashion. Tiara. CLASSIC
Rosie had a good day.She spoke to her nurse and all her labs have improved since February. She is scheduled for her 1st colonoscopy: Monday the 26th. She is high risk so the prep is not as bad as most. Miralax 2-3 times Friday/Saturday with a Low Residue Diet. On Sunday, clear fluids and Miralax 4 times. She doesn’t need an enema nor has to drink the gallon of that nasty stuff! I have had 5 colonoscopies. Diagnosed with Irritable Bowel Syndrome and Diabetic Gastroparesis. :-(
Took Dad to Capt D’s for his 71st birthday. Coconut Shrimp.
Went grocery shopping. Rosie has put me on a diet. Got all healthy foods today. Fruits, Veggies, Protein!
My sugar was down to 248 this am. I increased my metaglip from 2.5 to 5 mg twice a day yesterday. Went to 7.5 mg tonight. Will continue on that to see how my sugar levels reacts. Really not wanting to go back on insulin nor being attached to an insulin pump all the time but I may HAVE to.
Got home from shopping… just had sat down when I heard a loud noise. Seems Tater and Jazzi (our cats) had knocked down Dad’s 32″ Flatscreen TV in his bedroom… it comes on but the screen has lines all over it!!! It is only 9 months old and….. Looks like he will be buying a new one. BOO! Was hoping Dad would be buying him an Ipad for me to borrow…. looks like that may not happen now. AARDVARK!
I am feeling better today than I have in months. Grateful for that. Must have been high sugar levels dragging me down.
Just wish my fibro aches and pains would subside. Still feels like I have a ton of elephants pushing down on my shoulders. Even been having chest tightness lately. Still having balance issues. My hip has given out on me a few times recently.
My boys Smoki and Snickers are adoring the warm weather. Love going bye-bye with us. They are such a hoot. RIDING THE WIND. I had 4 of my boys in bed when I fell asleep last night.. Tater, Jazzi, Smoki, and Snickers…. all in a twin (single) bed.
Hope to dye my hair tomorrow…. Rosie’s too.
Dogs need bathed. They smell like DOG!
Just wish I had a man to take care of me. SO JEALOUS OF OTHERS WHO DO.
I am such a great person. Full of compassion with tons of love that I willing to share.
I KNOW MY HELPMATE IS OUT THERE SOMEWHERE! Just praying that he and I discover one another. TRYING to wait… just so hard at times. Just need someone to cuddle with, SHAG with, confide in, share life and all its experiences with. SCARED that I am always gonna be an old maid. I know that my predestined mate is out there. Perhaps even will read this blog entry…
I am asking The Lord Jesus Christ to guide my soulmate and I together. Let him know that I am the woman your created for him. I know all things are possible with God. I surrender my future love and myself to God. I know he and I will do great things together. I just know it! Bring me into his life and I into his.
God I admit and confess ALL my sins. FORGIVE ME. I know I should be doing more for You. Guide me to what I need to do for you. USE ME!
First about Rosie. Today she saw Dr Wilhoite a gastro-enterologist. She is scheduled to have a colonoscopy on Monday: March 26th. She had a very bad morning and afternoon. Thank God she is now feeling better. Doc ONLY wants Rose to do a 3 day miralax prep. She is going to ask for respite hours from her Home Health Aide’s to help with the colonoscopy prep. That will relieve some of my stress.
Prior to Gastric Bypass (9-14-2009) I was on an insulin pump to control my diabetes. After 18 months I was able to go off insulin and on to metaglip PILL for my sugar. It WAS working well. I USED to test my glucose levels 5-6 times a day. Which I did religiously for 20 years. Since Rosie had Gastric Bypass (7-23-2011) I have been neglectful and rarely tested my glucose levels. I know I need spanking!!! Rose has been so sick and that makes me so stressed. I checked today and my glucose was 405 when 70-120 is the goals set my my doctor. I took 2 metaglips pills and it dropped to 287. Most people are extremely ill when it passes 250 or so. I just have been more fatigued than normal. Going to go back on insulin tomorrow. Gonna call my Endocrinologist and perhaps even go back on the insulin pump. Stress has always raised my sugar levels. As does infections.
I had a dream about MR HANDSOME the other night. We had a huge wedding with family and friends. It was gorgeous. After the wedding, Mr Handsome stood up and started laughing and saying it was all a prank and that he would never marry a FAT ASS like me and proceeded to kick me out of his house. I woke up…
Seems like I am not worthy of being loved. Just need a reassuring hug tonight.
I pray to have more faith, patience, compassion, self-esteem and confidence. I am lacking in those categories.
I pray that John’s wife Jan starts feeling better. Missed seeing him tonight. Hope to chat tomorrow via webcam tomorrow.
Today is my Daddy’s 72nd Birthday.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY DADDY!
Gonna take him out for lunch @ Capt D’s. Will take him out on Thursday to Red Lobster in Pigeon Forge. Both are faves of his.
Having a severe fibro flare-up. Feels like there is a parade of elephants sitting on my shoulders.
Painful, achy, burning down my shoulders, arms, and elbows.
Makes me feel so exhausted.
Rosie didn’t have much nausea today. Praise God… BUT the diarrhea has returned. Just wish she would get well and STAY well. I love my baby sissy,
Since Rosie was not feeling well we stayed home today.
Hope to go grocery shopping tomorrow.
Ipad 3 HD has went from China to Hong Kong to Alaska. Wondering where its next stop is? Love technology!
Praises be to God for the emotional stability I’ve had for a few weeks now.
Praying for some physically stability.
Wish I didn’t have to deal and cope with diabetes, hypothyroidism, fibromyalgia, chronic fatigue, allergies, insomnia, neuropathy, irregular heart beat, marie-charcot-tooth syndrome, and irritable bowel syndrome… on a daily basis. Asking God to heal me from my afflictions so I am able to help others more than I am able to now. I want to be more confident, outgoing, and a better communicator.
Barely can keep my eyes open so I am off to bed.
Sending Love and Prayers to all my Family, my Friends and even my Foes.
Rosie is still feeling awesome. Eating well. I am so pleased. PRAISE JESUS for Answered prayers.
I am feeling good emotionally and spiritually but physically I ache all over. Having Chronic Fatigue, Fibromyalgia, Diabetes, Irritable Bowel Syndrome, Insomnia, Low Thyroid, Neuropathy, and Charcot-Marie Tooth Syndrome sucks.
Still having some episodes of depression, social anxieties, and panic attacks.
I did chat with a family friend, David, on Facebook Chat. He was the 1st I chatted with on Facebook… he is a pre-teen. He always makes me smile. He won KING at the Spring Dance! CONGRATS! Hope to see him on the trip to WV on March 18-20th. Last trip he spent the night with us at the cabin at Twin Falls Resort.
Also got to chat with my cousin Brandy. Even discussed her moving to Tennessee. Wants to start an animal rescue center. She works with the IRS and is gonna look for a job down here. She is like a sis to Rosie and I. She lived next to us in West Virginia. Love her.
Brandy and I both have the same emotional issues.
Not wanting to go out tomorrow…. needing rest BUT I need to go get my allergy shot.
Rosie ordered herself the new Ipad 3 HD. Will be here on March 16th. She is so excited. She deserves it since she went through 7.5 months of hell!
Thrilled she is feeling better.
Fatigued beyond words and heading to bed. Pray that I get some sleep.
Dad, Rosie, The Boys and I went to the Great Smokies Flea Market today. We took the Boys pet stroller which they both USED to fit in…. Snickers has grown so big that it was a tight fit. So Rosie bought a pet stroller than holds 4 small pets. Ended up selling the old Stroller to a lady for $20… she was thrilled to get it. It was a bargain. New stroller was $86
Rosie bought the boys new harnesses to go with the new collars she got earlier this week. So Snazzy!
Picked up some $1 jewelry items. I bought a long dress for $8 brand new. Rosie got her one as well.
Rosie woke up this morn and started vomiting as soon as she took her meds. Had nausea off and on all day. She fell asleep about an hour ago. Hope she wakes up feeling better.
Went to Capt. Gallery in Dandridge for Dinner. Rosie and I split the Ribeye, Jumbo Shrimp, Fried Zucchini and Salad. We have enough ribeye leftover to feed us both supper tomorrow. I also have some fried zucchini left over. YUM! Was gonna order some clam chowder but forgot to. Thank God.. I couldn’t have ate it. Was stuffed.
SnickerDoodle has been so protective of me this evening. Will not allow Smoki to come near me. Growling at him. Not sure why.
Need to find a dentist. Need a good cleaning and perhaps a filling. Want one closer to us than Dr. Frankie office.
Had a panic attack or hot flash… at the flea market. Was drenched head to toe with sweat for almost an hour. Skin was flushed. HATE IT.
Got home and my face is puffy. Wasn’t when I left. Not sure… but I bet it is allergy related.
Thinking about cutting bangs again. Not sure.
John adored my hair tonight. I rolled it with 1″ velcro rollers. Used tons of ‘em. Looked so feathery and shiny.
Rosie is craving an Hawaiian Ice so we are going on an excursion to find one tomorrow. Wish us luck.
Had issues with my balance today. Almost fell flat on my butt twice today. Just unsteady. Really need to get an injection in my right hip as Doc Kouser wanted to do.
SO HAPPY for my friends in Nashville. Good things are heading their way. Movie is being made by Universal based on their lives. INSPIRATIONAL! Blessed to have them in my life. I love em all. Hope that one day we can meet one another.
Just realized I haven’t taken my meds tonight.. Oops… BRB. Took em.
I haven’t taken my vitamins/minerals/supplements in a week or so. Gonna start back.
Also I have been naughty…. Been consuming way more carbs that I should. Makes me feel sluggish. I should know better but Carbs are so comforting to me.
Will prolly be going to West Virginia on Friday. Hope the large handicapped cabin at Twin Falls State Park is available. May have to change the day we go. We LOVE that cabin cause so many of our WV family can stay with us. :-)
Having aches and pains. May have to increase my dosage on my pain meds back to what the doc wants me to take. Tried to lower them and OUCH!
Dad was in a great mood this afternoon. Thank God cause sometimes he is the grouchiest old man on earth. Dad attracts so many women. Always trying to pick him up. He does NOT look 71 at all. Still has all his hair and he is indeed handsome. HE DOES NOT WANT TO DATE ANYONE.
I do want to date YET I get no dudes trying to pick me up. NONE. Only man who has come up to me and asked me out was the man (Hager) that I married. Rest of the men I dated were through personal newspaper ads.Men may be interested in me and I am just tooo dumb and socially inept that I don’t recognize it. Ooops… One other man asked me out at church in 1991. He didn’t have a car nor a job so I politely declined.
I don’t go anywhere without Rosie. Only time I have been apart was during hospitalizations. Maybe 3-4 times I was gone for a few hours with Hager. I did spend 3 over night trips at Gary’s (aka WV Millionaire dude) house
The only time I ever went on a date ALONE with a man was my honeymoon night… Always had Rosie or they brought their friends along. I would love to have a man pick me up, bring me flowers and take me out just for dinner. Just Dinner is all I ask.
Only one man has sent me flowers and that was Steven Bryant Ward aka Poison98. I met him through a Poison Chat Room that he hosted. He and I had a cyber which progressed to a phone relationship for almost a year. We had planned on him flying in from Tulsa, Oklahoma to West Virginia to meet and he backed out the week we was coming to meet me. We ended up staying together for a few months after that. He sent me flowers for my birthday. I am a December babe and the flowers were sent in a unique green globe ornament vase. Still have it in my bedroom.
Goodness, I have missed out on so much in my life…. It is time for that to change!
I know I have a few men who reads my journal often. One is The Actor, Game Show Host, Mr Intelligence himself Stephen Fry! http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stephen_Fry He says he is 90% gay and 10% straight. I have written him a few naughty PRIVATE (you have to follow one another to send PRIVATE messages on Twitter) flirtatious tweets and he always replies. I love an intelligent man who knows who he is and stands up for what he believes in… way more than a handsome one. But I do admire a handsome warm heart and soul.
I know that some awesome things are about to transpire in my life. Excited. Lord, I surrender prepare me for all the new adventures I am about to undertake!
We are gonna take the Boys: Smoki Poki Loki (Carin Terrier aka Toto dog) and SnickerDoodle Bug (Miniature long haired dachshund) for a Sunday drive through the country side. We have taken Sunday drives for as long as I can remember. So relaxing. Love to admire all the glorious beauty God has created. Well it is relaxing until Smoki sees cows, deers, goats. horses, rabbits, etc. Then all heck breaks lose. He goes nuts. Barking. UGH! But what is even worse is when it is raining and we have the windshield wipers on… Smoki dives into the dashboard after them. UGH! And I am even holding him and his leash! Snickers and Smoki enjoyed having the window down today….As Bret Michaels wrote, “RIDE THE WIND, Never coming back till I touch the midnight sun.” I sing that to the Boys and they go bonkers cause they know I am about to roll down the window!
Asking the Lord Jesus Christ to help me SAY NO TO CARBS! Praying for energy to do more things. Chronic fatigue is debilitating. UGH. I am gonna do at least 30 min of household chores daily. Asking God for the willpower to do more things without pain and to control my appetite. I SURRENDER.
My cousin Brandy found 6 puppies dropped off on a country road in WV. They are so cute. She is keeping one and going to find homes for the others. Pray they all received loving homes. Looks like part German Shepherd.
When 9-11-01 happened I was seeing a psychiatrist prior to it happening. It was so difficult to deal with. A few months after it happened My shrink made me promise not to read or watch news about it. Still upsetting to me. Now all these tornadoes, hurricanes, natural [...]
After 17 years of celibacy I have decided to date!
Praying for wisdom, guidance and patience.
I am also becoming more extroverted online and in the real world.
Been blessed to be making more friends online. I am actually messaging a few male friends back now. :-) MAJOR ADVANCEMENT !
BUCKET LIST:
Date Again!
See the ocean.
Fly in a plane.
Get my passport.
Get married again.
Use all the gifts God gave me.
Be more supportive of everyone… except Republicans. LOL!
Be more compassionate.
Be more outgoing.
Stop having social anxiety and panic attacks.
Get use to talking on the phone without having a panic attack.
Get healthier.
Smile more.
Help those less fortunate.
Be more patient.
Be more vocal online.
Lose more weight.
Make new friends.
I have a few men that I am interested in. Just wanting for them to make a move. Having all kinds of men flirt with me online and reality… I am now trying to FLIRT with guys in person. Social Anxiety Sucks!
I am so proud of Rosie. She has lost 175 lbs now. She will be able to get fitted for a new wheelchair in July! Rosie only weighs 35 lbs more than me now. Looking great! You go sis! Rosie is wearing size 20-22 jeans now.
I am down to size 10-12 in jeans. :-) Down from a 26. WOO-HOO.
Rosie and I both are now getting allergy shots.
Thinking about talking to my family doc about my mood swings.
May even start seeing a shrink again.
Wish Rosie would not have so much nausea and vomiting. She even had a dizzy spell today.
Having fibromyalgia aches and pains.. plus Fibro Fog. I hate the mental confusion it creates. Not thinking clearly. Seems like I think in slow-mo. HATE IT!
Enjoying my new puppy. SnickerDoodle, he is a BLONDE Long haired Miniature Dachshund, who worships me!
Snickers gets along with all our pets: Smoki, Jazzi, Punkin, Panther and Tater.
Snickers loves going bye-bye.
Smoki and Snickers love baskin-robbins ice cream. Take them every few weeks.
My Best friend John has been having health issues. I am worried about him. Pray that he gets better and that he sleeps well.
I have been wearing short skirts, pantyhose and knee high leather boots. I have fabulous legs! Bet I tried on 20 pairs of boots till I found one to fit my skinny legs.
I layered my hair a few weeks ago and can’t believe how wavy it is naturally.
Haven’t had much sleep lately. Rosie wakes me up a few times nightly. Tummy issues. Pray that I get some decent sleep tonight.
Praying for the man I was created for, the one God designed for me. I KNOW you are out there waiting for me. Thinking of me. Praying for me. Maybe we already know one another. Grant US both wisdom, guidance, & patience. Open up our hearts, minds, souls, and spirits to recognize each other when the time is right. Happy about my future. I know it is gonna be a good one!
I believe that God speaks and gives signs to some people… I pray that this night that God speaks to me and/or to my helpmate. Let US know. Comfort us. Give us patience. Let US Dream of one another.
Hope to travel to WV to see my family in a few weeks. I love and miss them dearly.
My sis Rosie had her 3 month Gastric Bypass Checkup. Since Feb she has lost over +125 lbs. She only weighs 66 lbs more than me now. You go Sis! Just wish her nausea would dissipate. Her hernia wound has healed enough and was told she can now start aquatic therapy!!! Woo-Hoo! Calling the Boy and Girls Club as well as Jefferson Community Pool tomorrow. Hope to start on Monday. LIFE IS GOOD!
I saw Dr. Stephen G. Boyce, who did Rosie’s gastric bypass surgery, today. I am having him investigate my continuing gastro-intestinal issues that has bothered me ever since I had my roux-en-y on Sept 14th, 2009. He has a few theories on why I only lost 50 or so pounds from the roux-en-y surgery. I should have lost 100+ lbs. Theories are my pouch should be smaller: 15 ml and not 30ml. More of my intestines need bypassed. Scar tissue. Bowel Kink.
I am having an abdominal CT Scan on Nov 1st.
*IF* it is what Dr Boyce thinks it may be, I will have to undergo another Laparoscopic surgery and I should be able to lose more weight. My BMI is still 35.3. Still OBESE!
Still suffering from upper left quadrant abdominal pains, bloating, gas and diarrhea. Severe at times.
Just hoping that some of Dr Boyce’s theories show up on the CT scan and that I can have another lap surgery and get on my way to a healthier life. He hopes it is due more to my lower bowel area than a problem with my upper stomach region. Lower gastrointestinal prob will be much easier to fix… than an upper one.
He is starting me on flagyl and was suggesting Cholestyramine till I told him I was already on Welchol. They are in the same family of meds. I have tired Cholestyramine in the past unsuccessfully.
I had gastric bypass to help me get off some of my meds. Well, I am off insulin but now on 3 NEW meds for my stomach issues!!! My current med list:
Atenolol Heart Rate/Blood Pressure Bentyl Irritable Bowel Buspar Social Anxiety Cymbalta Depression/Fibromyalgia/ CMT Loperamide Irritable Bowel Lortab Chronic Fatigue//Fibromyalgia Meta-Glip Diabetes/Insulin Resistance Synthroid Hypothyroid Trazodone Depression/Insomnia Welchol Irritable Bowel Xanax Anxiety/Insomnia Fish Oil Multi Vitamin/Mineral Biotin IRON Probiotic Vitamin B Complex D3
I AM A WALKING PHARMACY! LOL!
I really need to lose weight to help with my Charcot Marie Tooth Syndrome “CMT” which I was recently diagnosed with.
CMT Morbus Charcot-Marie-Tooth, Charcot-Marie-Tooth neuropathy, hereditary motor and sensory neuropathy (HMSN), hereditary sensorimotor neuropathy (HSMN), or peroneal muscular atrophy, is an inherited disorder of nerves (neuropathy) that takes different forms. It is characterized by loss of muscle tissue and touch sensation, predominantly in the feet and legs but also in the hands and arms in the advanced stages of disease. Currently incurable.
I inherited it from my dad. My legs and feet are getting weaker. I have extremely high arches and claw toes. When I walk, all my weight lands on the balls of my feet and not evenly as it is suppose to. My feet are starting to turn outward. Have very tight Achilles tendons. Gluts and Quads are also too tight. I started therapy last week to help prevent further damage. I have had issues all my life with twisting my ankles, losing my balance, and falling. At least now I know there is a reason and not just my clumsiness! CMT is a Muscular Dystrophy disease.
Angela October 20th, 2011 Dr Boyce's Office.
Still desiring to lose 50-75 additional pounds… with Dr Boyce’s surgical mind, capable hands, and his wonderful compassion, coupled with my rejuvenated desire to lose more weight; I am sure it can be accomplished.
I have been exercising for 15-30 min a day. Using resistant bands, stretches, and isometrics. Hope to go to aquatic aerobics 2-3 times a week. I will have to rise and shine by 7 am on the days we go… Just have to start getting my rump in bed earlier than the 4 am I am accustomed to.
I am so tired today. Got up at 8 am. Now my upper abdominal area is extended. Bloated horribly. Has been for a few hours. Miserable.
Went to Puleos in Strawberry Plains. I had a salad (greens, cheese, tomatoes, croutons, and cucumbers) homemade Italian dressing… I may have used 1 Tablespoon. Got stuffed after the salad and only had 3-4 bites of citrus chicken and 2 bites of sirloin. 3 bites of sesame noodles. One bite of bread.
I have known John for almost 4 years now. He and I text chat with video cam. No audio. I am just too shy… I finally made him a video of me taking to him with Audio. I have never made a video of myself until now.., BUT Damn I am so cute!!! Adorable. Sweet Southern Voice. John loved it! Gonna audio Chat with him LIVE this week. Think I have enough courage to do it. His step-grandsons (13 and 15) are out of school on Fall break and have been staying with him all week. Lucky to even see him on cam this week let alone TALK to him live… Hope to webcam chat with audio over the weekend.
We are heading out to pick up meds tomorrow and then gonna drive bye FrightMare Manor http://frightmaremanor.com/ to see how busy they are. It is about 2.5 miles from my house. Extremely popular attraction.
I am getting more confidence and self esteem. Feeling womanly. Dressing sexier. Receiving lots of male attention. :-)
Been playing with makeup. Tried a few different looks this week. Some were nice… others.. eh… not so much. LOL!
I wore a black mini-dress. It is called Bandage Dress. Got it 2 years ago and finally wore it for the first time today. It is a size 16 but I could have easily worn it in a size 12. Really pleased with the way my legs looked today! Main body issue I hate is my saggy flabby tummy. Lots of loose skin there. My face is also sagging some. Been doing facial exercises and hope that it get taunter. I also have a few wrinkles on my forehead… but hell I look spectacular to be almost 46 years old! LOL!
October 20, 2011
Hoping to visit my West Virginia Family in a few weeks. Missing them all. Sending love and prayers to all of them especially to Brandy, Sara, Becky and MaShayla. Praying that Shay’s cat Zena comes home soon. Sending get well wishes to Aunt Earlene. We are hoping to stay in a Cabin At Twin Falls Resort… if one of the handicapped cabins is available the weekend we go in.
My snack tonight will be low fat mozzarella string cheese and a few red seedless grapes…. and then off to bed.
Over the past few years so many wonderful and exciting changes have came into my life. Some I help create, some were surprisingly sprung upon me and some transformations that I never even knew I wanted suddenly came galloping into my life. Hope that the metamorphosis continues.
I currently weigh over 100 lbs less than my highest weight of 315 lbs. (I am STILL over 200 lbs.) Gastric Bypass “Lap Roux-En-Y” and a low carb and high protein diet helped me get to this point. I would love to lose 25-35 additional lbs. I was on that way to that goal when Rosie (my sissy) underwent her Gastric Bypass “Lap Biliopancreatic Diversion with Duodenal Switch” and her subsequent MRSA infections derailed my weight loss. I gained 4 lbs. in the last 2 months. I am one of those people who EAT carbs when stressed and having my baby sister so ill, whom I am a caregiver for, was extremely stressful for me… hence I ate way more carbs than a diabetic or a gastric bypass patient should. At times, I still do. Rosie had nausea and some vomiting today so I ate a bunch of Hershey miniature candies and 2 bananas.. Sugar is 272 as I type this. Should be 70-120.. So disappointed in myself but I am gonna gain control… I have to.
All week I have had so much energy… well spurts of it at least. Right now I am hyper. Will prolly clean the dining area prior to bed. So glad that I am having SOME energy since I have virtually none the majority of the time due to chronic fatigue syndrome and fibromyalgia. Thinking back it seems I ALWAYS feel better in Sept/October… wondering if the cooler weather benefits me more than hot weather does. I have never tolerated HOT weather. Hmmm… gonna have to move to a more temperate climate … sunny, mild and breezy sounds lovely… Hawaii sounds about right!
I have so many plans for my future. Really gungho. I am gonna lose those 25-35 NAGGING lingering pounds…. and when I do I am gonna go have a tummy tuck. I absolutely positively detest my saggy and baggy lose skin in my stomach Panniculus region. I bet I could wear a size 6 or an 8 jean if I didn’t have this excess skin! In stretch denim I can wear a size 12 now.
I was this same weight 20 years ago when I married and divorced Michael Patterson Hager, Jr. He and I married 20 Years ago on Sunday. Divorced shortly after. He was just a brain fart in my life. LOL! I can NOT believe I married such a low life and gave up my virginity to him. (yep I was a 25 year old virgin. I was NO ANGEL…. He and I did fool around some prior to the wedding but I saved the best for last) I honestly am such a different lady now… Not as naive.
Age, Wisdom, Time, and Growth go hand in hand.
There have been times when I have acted high and mighty towards others and said things I regret. Acted like I was better than they were and I wish I hadn’t. I ask those whom I did this to to forgive me. I am no angel. Have never been and will never be. I am HUMAN and make mistakes like everyone else does.
I am very shy around those that I don’t know very well… BUT those close to me know that in actuality, I can be flirty, bawdy, raucous, and even hilarious. I hate having social anxiety. It keeps me from forming relationships… online and in real life. It has been 17 years since I dated. Yes…. it will be…. SEVENTEEN Years…. on Nov 18th. I have a wonderful ONLINE ONLY friendship with John. Known him for almost 4 years now.
You would never know it from reading my journal or my postings online but I have a high Intelligence Quotient… major issue I have is saying something that makes me look like a fool… or worrying about hurting other peoples feelings…. I worry way too much about what other people THINKS about me. Oh yep… I am also snobbishly proud to be the QUEEN Of the Ellipsis… LOL!
I want “THE REAL ANGELA” to come across online and in reality. I wish everyone could see the Angela that my sis Rosie and My Friend John sees. That would be a major breakthrough. I am gonna attempt to accomplish that and many other goals. 2011 has only a few months left and in those few months they are gonna be some spectacular changes in me. My appearance has changed dramatically in the 2 years, since I had gastric bypass and now is the time for my personality to shine brilliantly…. like a diamond in the sky. Sparking. Twinkling. Radiantly. Everlasting.
My renewed faith is strong and I know I can do anything I set my mind to.
I have to thank my beloved John for helping me get to this point in my life. He is the greatest man I have ever known after my Daddy. He is always there for me. Supportive. Compassionate. Considerate. Helpful. Complimentary. He is a professional. Works for the Scottish Government. Wears suits and Ties. WOW.. I loved the way he looked tonight. Majority of the time I see him in sweats but the past few evenings he has been working late and came to our webcam chat in his business attire. Tonight was a black dress shirt and a black and white polka dotted tie. So spiffy. Fashionable. I adore that he is so intelligent. He loves computers as much as I do. Knowledgeable in so many varied subjects… so unlike all the other men I have loved. Yes LOVED> I love that rascal and he loves me. He and I will remain ONLY friends unless God has other plans but for now it is a friendship. A partnership. He and I are emotionally closer than the preponderance of husbands and wives. He and I support one another. Comfort each other. ‘GET’ one another. So happy that I replied to his message 4 years ago. I knew immediately he was different. He and I met at a BBW “Big Beautiful Woman” friendship site… which has since shuttered.
John has been having some problems with his arm/elbow after falling off a ladder last weekend. Having major trouble sleeping. Pray that he gets a good nights sleep. I can’t wait to see him tomorrow night.
I have been tidying up my bedroom so John and I can have a private talk. It has been a long time since we chatted in private. Maybe twice in the last 2 years. Have been chatting on my laptop in Rosie’s room. Been TEXT chatting only… hope to talk by phone/webcam chat this weekend. He only has been seeing my face on webcam…. This weekend I will let him see me and the weight I have since lost.
I am experiencing body issues. Nothing new…. I was 315 lbs when I met John… and I was actually more comfy with my body then than I am now. I used to be way more provocative back then. I miss that part of me. Lately I have been wearing short dresses and tighter clothes. Even dyed my hair back to the color it was 20 years ago when I weighed the same. BLACK hair just suits me better. Even been wearing human hair extensions and wigs. Gastric bypass caused me to lose some of my luxurious mane. I cut over 15″ off over a year ago to see if that would make it look fuller. It didn’t…. Still almost as thin. My hair is now 23″ long again. It was over 30″ prior to the bypass. Hope to get it that long again. It is very healthy. Shiny. Just straggly and scrawny. Especially in the front area. :-( I am just thankful that they make decent and affordable hair extensions and wigs now. I do wear my own hair the majority of the time but [...]
Rosie is severely malnourished and dehydrated…. and is finally receiving nutrition through an IV.
Sara the RN showed me how to use the IV pump and mix up the customized infusions to give Rosie. She will be on it for the next 48 hours straight and then it will be 12 hours at night only after that.
I am learning so much about medical care. Looks like I will have my RN license by the end of the week. LOL!
Rosie’s temp was 99.5.
BP was normal.
I am testing her glucose levels every 6 hours.
I have to flush her PICC lines twice daily with saline. Was also given heparin syringes to flush them if needed.
Also have to clean and stuff her JP drain wound once a day with dry packing ribbon. She has a tunnel about 4 cm into her stomach area. It was bloodier today than it had been. Thank God I am not squeamish at all.
The hernia wound repair wound is open and healing nicely so far. It started out about 2W x 3L x 2D but is closing. Still looks like a crater. A wound vac is attached to it to help with the healing process. She ONLY has mild pain now.
Only thing Rosie can keep down is water. Bet she has lost 45 lbs in the last month… maybe even more than that.
Her esophagus is not burning now. Started Prilosec yesterday.
She has an area on her tummy that is red, inflamed and hot. Nurse agreed with me that it looks like cellulitis. Will call Dr Melling tomorrow about it.
Her PT and INR is at a therapeutic level. Will prolly resume coumadin 5 mg tomorrow.
Rosie felt horrible this evening. Was so bad that she was crying. She is now feeling better and is sound to sleep. PRAISE GOD!
My Baby Love John is not feeling well. He either has gallstones or an ulcer. He can’t get a doc appt for a week. Will prolly end up in the ER. Sending all my love and prayers to him in Scotland.
Hope I sleep well tonight as I did last night.
Rosie had been waking me every 2-3 hours to use a bedpan BUT for almost a week now I am the one waking her to urinate. Barely urinating at all. Maybe had an output of 600 cc today. Under 800 is dangerous. The IV fluids will surely have her peeing more often hopefully with more output. I expect her to wake me every 3 hours tonight or so. Takes me forever to go back to sleep. :-(
I am so exhausted. Doing so much for Rosie and not dealing with worry and stress very well. So much going on with Rosie. So worried about her. She was way more talkative after getting the TPN infusions going. She says as soon as she is able she and I are headed to Gatlinburg and Pigeon Forge for a week vacay! WOO-HOO. Smoki and Dad are also going with us.
Really hope to go to WV in a few months. Would love to see my cousins Rebecca, Sara, Shay, and Brandy. Plus my Aunts and Uncles there.
Sending healing prayers to Rebecca… she is having edema which docs have yet to find treatment or cause for. She sees a rheumatologist soon.
Praying for cousin Brandy and her allergy issues. Ah-Choo!
Thankful for Rosie’s home health aides… Peggy and Dina are FAMILY now. Love them dearly and appreciate all they do.
Been on the phone most of the day with doctors, nurses, and medical coordinators. Getting Rosie all fixed up to receive a variety of services.
Mediserv brought a trapeze bar and we didn’t have room for it. It was to help Rosie raise her self up in her hospital bed better. BUT it needed a foot behind the head of her bed and we just don’t have room for it.
Received one order of medical supplies by UPS and another one by courier today. Can only imagine how much all this is costing. Thank God it all is 100% covered by medicare, dad’s private insurance Wells Fargo and Medicaid/ Tenncare. Her gastric bypass surgery was prolly around $50,000. Bet her hernia repair was around $20,000. Can only imagine how much the hospital bed, medical supplies, IV pump and the nurses visits are costing. Just glad she has insurance.
The doc prescribed Zofran for Rosie. It is something like $700 for 30 pills. Thank God they have a generic one now. Insurance would not cover that particular med. Dad had to pay $45 for it.
I have over 60 doses of lovenox injections. They cost a small fortune… insurance paid. Hoping the pharmacy can take them back. The Dr JUST prescribed too many of them.
Time to wake Rosie and test her glucose and then off to bed for me.
Asking everyone to pray for Rosie to have a speedy recovery. Thanks.
So blessed to had a caregivers help this weekend. Peggy helped us tremendously. I was able to nap 3-4 hours. Trying to catch up on lost sleep.
Gonna miss the additional help Rosie has been having the past 2 afternoon’s and nights. So hard to get her in and out of bed by myself.
Rosie had a good day. Peggy and I were able to shampoo Rosie’s hair. It had been 11 days since it was washed.
Rosie did well on her quota’s that Dr Boyce requires::
60+ grams of Protein
64+ ounces of Fluids
2 scoops of Dr Boyce’s powered vitamins.
I give Rosie lovenox injections daily.
Nurse Pete taught me how to clean her picc line with saline. Have to do it twice daily.
An RN will be here 3 x’s a week. They will be changing the picc line dressing and changing all the Wound Vac dressing from her open hernia wound. They also will be doing a PT and INR testing of her blood twice a week.
Rosie had some diarrhea today. Hope that it subsides. She is staying pretty full from all the protein shakes, juices, and water. She drank too much and too fast tonight and had minor indigestion.
Smoki, my cairn terrier, is so jealous that Rosie is getting so much attention. He has been down in the dumps… gonna give him extra attention before he goes to bed with me. He thinks everyone should be focusing on him.
My sugar got too low tonight. Just getting it back to normal. I ate some Strawberry Hi-Lo Low Carb Cereal… was Yummy.
I am aching all over tonight. Sore muscles and joints. Vicoden is not even helping with the pain and burning. :-(
Had some weird ear sensations all day today. Not sure what is up with that.
Been so busy that I neglected taking my vitamins for the past 2 weeks. Started on them again last night.
Rosie’s caregiver Dina will be here for a few hours tomorrow and Wednesday. Peggy returns on Friday. Pete will be here Tues, Thurs, and Saturdays for the next 6 weeks.
Pray that Rosie’s hospital bed arrives tomorrow. Had to be special ordered. Grateful that Rosie has insurance that covers all her medical needs. Gonna get Dr Melling to order her a new wheelchair seat. Her wheelchair is so uncomfy that I am certain it is contributing to her lower back aches and pains.
I bet she has lost 20 more lbs. Will be excited to see how much weight she has lost. Will know Friday when she goes to Dr Boyce. Since she is in a wheelchair and unable to stand,Dr Boyce weighs her while in the wheelchair and then we take away 275 lbs for the wheelchair and its batteries.
I am hoping that I can get to my next goal weight by Friday. Fingers crossed. Only 4 lbs away!
Had a severe panic attack at the grocery store yesterday. Hate to go shopping alone. :-(
Rosie is so sore that she can’t sit up very straight. So slouchy all the time. Pray she regains her strength. She is getting stronger by the day.
I have to take a letter from Dr Boyce to Dr Melling’s office in regards to her blood thinner management.
Need to get some groceries for dad. He says he has no food in the kitchen… our pantry is mainly filled with foods that he won’t eat… aka Healthy Foods.
I pray that Rosie sleeps well throughout the night and only has to get me up once. She has been waking me every 2 hours… she needs assistance with using her bedpan. She is drinking so many fluids that all she does is urinate. Dr Boyce wants her to urinate at least 600-700cc a day and she mets that quota easily in one peeing. I She is urinating around 10 times a day. I bet Dad does not pee 600 cc in a WEEK! He does not drink enough fluids and we constantly fuss at him.
Dad pickled some beets and eggs. They are so yummy. Will be even better by tomorrow.
Gonna go get Smoki and head to bed.
Thanks for your prayers for Rosie and may they continue. Thanks!
July 6th 8:00 Dr. Boyce CLASSJuly 6th 12:15 Dr. Boyce FINAL LABSJuly 11th 1:45 Dr. Boyce VISITJuly 11th 3:45 Hospital PRE-OPJuly 19th Coumadin STOPJuly 26th 7:00 SURGERY
She will be having Duodendal Switch with Biliopancreatic Diverision on July 26th with Dr Stephen Boyce as Surgeon.
Rosie and I both will be starting a MONTH long high protein liquid diet prior to her surgery. I am doing it in support of her. I hope to lose a few pounds and lose 15-25 lbs. during this time.
Rosie is getting excited about losing weight and regaining some of her life. Appreciate your prayers. THANKS!
I am so happy for her yet worried at the same time. I pray that surgery and recovery goes smoothly and that she can adapt readily to the lifestyle DS/BPD requires.
I had Roux-en-Y surgery on Sept 14th 2009 and lost over 1oo lbs. Doing well. I still can only eat small meals at a time. I have days where I still have issues with certain foods. But mainly eat what I want but in limited quantities. My life has changed since surgery. I have more confidence and self esteem. I can do more but with having chronic fatigue syndrome and fibromylalgia I often do more than I should and end up paying for it later. Like I can go out and shop for a few hours and then barely can get out of bed the next day. Still having fibro aches and pains as I did prior to surgery. I still don’t tolerate heat very well. It can be 95 degrees outside.. and when I walk into an air-conditioned store I end up with chills and torrential sweats. HATE THAT!
My Family doc has been trying various meds to help with my IBS. Was on Questran and it didn’t help. Start on Bentyl tomorrow. Been having cramps and diarrhea more and more often. Fecal incontinence is almost nightly now. No fun at all. Embarrassing and humiliating. Not sure what has caused this but it happened after Gastric Bypass Surgery. If Bentyl does not help Welchol is the next treatment planned. I am on Immodium a few times daily. Have been for years.
I start on metaglip tomorrow for my diabetes and stop glipizide. I continue on Victoza as long as I can get samples from my endocrinologist since my insurance will NOT cover it.
Still on Cymbalta, Xanax, and Trazodone for my nerves and anxiety.
I take Vicodin for my fibromylagia pain.
I am now wearing a size 10-12-14 in clothing.. All depends on the designer. I even have a few 7-9 that I wear. VANITY SIZING! Cause I am a size 16 I am sure! I have about 10-15 lbs of excess stomach skin. Gonna be talking to some plastic surgeons about removing it. Still desiring breast augmentation. What I once had is now saggy sloping deflated boobs. Have to roll em up to get them in my bra. LOL! Not really… but almost!
I still can’t believe I got my drivers license. So PROUD of myself. Major break-through for me. Congrats to myself.
John just got back from Portugal and Spain today. Has an awesome tan. Looks incredible. Glad he got some time to enjoy himself. Was thrilled to see him tonight. Woo-Hoo! We have a special date night planned for Wednesday. I missed him so much and cried daily while he was away. He and I webcam daily whenever possible. Have yet to meet. He is my best friend. We adore one another.
For 17 years I have not dated, been kissed or made love to. Yes, I am lonely and I pray to have patience, perseverance, wisdom, and guidance to whomever or whatever God wants me to have in my life.
I am going out to the mall tomorrow afternoon/evening. May go to the movies. Not sure yet.Rosie and I need new bedsheets. Plus Rosie needs a few items for after surgery. Already got her some really cute nighties. She has dropped 2 dress sizes this year. So proud of her. She is gonna be one hot sexy SKINNY mama! She is already gorgeous.. Can only imagine what she will look like in the future.
Went to The Great Smoky Flea Market yesterday. Got some lovely Fascinators. John loved the hot pink flowery fascinator I had on tonight. I also got 2 maxi halter dresses… BRAND NEW… for only $6 each. Got a size XL but needed L or perhaps a M. The dresses are so sexy but too revealing to wear out in public without a jacket or shawl. I wore the hot pink Hawaiian flowered one today to the Doctor. Mainly wore it for John. He thought I looked beautiful… and I DID! Also bought lots of $1 earrings. So adorable. Smoki went with us. He had a blast. He got fitted for a new red harness. He is so studly!
We were out for only around an hour yesterday. It was so hot. My body thermostat is all screwed up due to Fibromylagia… so when perspire… I sweat… dripping… drenched… UGH! They are times even in cold weather where I will have chills and the sweats at the same time. UGH. Frustrating to say the least. Since Gastric Bypass I get cold so easily. I will wear a sweatshirt most evenings cause I am so cold.
Another thing that has changed is my tailbone. I never had much of an Badonkadonk even at 315 lbs. So, now, after losing 110+ lbs I have zero butt left. No cushion there now…So my tailbone aches most of the day…. So I HAVE a pain in the ass daily.. Some say I AM a pain in the ass. LOL!
Allergy season is killing me. My nose will start dripping all the sudden… like a faucet…as well as my eyes tearing.. looks like I am crying. UGH! Benadryl and Claritin is not helping.
I have some leftover taco’s from El Sazon that I am making for my dinner tonight. I get them carryout. 9 taco’s with Meat and Cheese only… with Lettuce and Tomato on the side. They give me almost a head of lettuce and 2-3 chopped tomatoes. I remove the taco shells and discard them. The Taco meat, cheese, lettuce and tomatoes makes me at least 3 meals not counting how many dad and Rosie eats. So Tasty and filling. So glad that I can Still only eat small portions. Hope it stays that way forever.
I have also started doing laundry daily. Something I have never did in my life. I am getting good at it and actually enjoy it.
I am living with aches and pains from fibro, the IBS issues, my allergies, my insomnia/hypersomnia troubles, my diabetes, and my continuing social anxiety and panic attacks. It could be better and yet it could be worse… I am grateful for all the blessings and pray for the strength to conquer obstacles in my life. It will get better…
I am not the same woman I was a few years ago and that is in a good way.
I only wish I could enjoy all the fabulous changes and opportunities coming my way… But Chronic Fatigue Syndrome and Fibromylagia are not allowing that. If I over-do it even a lil bit I am down for days trying to recoup from it. I have been aching from my head to my toes lately. Exhausted and lethargic. Been needing 12 hours of sleep even to attempt getting up the next day.
I have to Thank God, Dad, Rosie and John for helping me overcome so many obstacles. Also many thanks to all my doctors: Dr Blake Melling (Family Doctor) , Dr Joanne Langton (Endocrinologist) , and Dr Aqueel Kouser (Rheumatologist) to just mention a few.
Spent a lovely 3 night / 4 day weekend in Gatlinburg with my Sister Rosie. I was more fatigued this time than last years mini-vacay to Gatlinburg Family Fest / Gaither Homecoming Concerts. Went to 5 shows. Had a good time in spite of hurting in my shoulders, neck, back, legs and tailbone. I had to go to the bathroom often just to help relieve some of the tailbone aches. It helped.
I am down over 110 lbs now. Wearing a size 10-12. Receiving so much attention from men and I love it. Had guys ask me this past weekend if they could have their picture taken with me…. and that is not counting the ones who took my picture without even asking. FLATTERING.
I am dressing different than I had been. Getting back to dressing more provocative but not over doing it… gotta remember I am a 45 year old woman. Loving wearing dresses and showing off my legs.
Angela trying to look sexy and failing at it miserably. LOL!
My hair is now Jet Black. I use to dye it black for years… mainly in my 20′s. Love it and so does everyone else! I also cut some short bangs ala Bettie Page style.. but I still can style them away from my face if I want to. I sometimes wear hair extensions, wigs, and clip on pony-tails on occasion. Like to change my look often. Been wearing my hair is a beehive bouffant style lately.
Rosie had a eye appt. Visual Field Test prior to starting Plaquenil. My eye doc who is also Rosie’s eye doc, his nurse and receptionist barely recognized me. First time they had seen me with Makeup. I look majorly different with makeup they could not believe how beautiful I looked today.
I finally was brave enough to go take my road test to get my drivers license. Didn’t tell no one but Dad and Rosie just in case I failed… BUT I passed on my first attempt. WOO-HOO! Now if I can only get Dad to let me and Rosie take the mini-van out alone. He still says no… that I am not ready for that yet. I hope to make a short trip out with just Rosie and I…. we may go to the grocery store OR to McDonalds for some Unsweetened Ice Tea. MAYBE.
Rosie has a surgery date for Gastric Bypass. It is July 26th. She has to get pre-op testing, take an education class over the next few weeks. She will be on a low carb-high protein diet all of July. She has already lost 2 dress sizes. I am so proud of her.
Rose and Angela Picture was taken on Rosie's 44th Birthday
Gonna be driving to West Virginia to visit family as soon as the weather dips down to the 70′s- mid 80′s.
I do have more self confidence on some days. Still suffering from panic attacks. On Xanax full time now. SNOOZE…
My Rheumy has me on a high dose of a narcotic and it is helping *some* with the pain I have but it makes me so drowsy. ZZZZZZZZZZZZZ. Snore…
Sugars are doing well. My Insurance will not cover Victoza injections but my doc is willing to give me samples. I may have to go on byetta soon. Will see.
Been having severe anxiety and depression at times. Gonna discuss it with Melling this week. I feel so helpless and worthless at times.
Rosie’s lower back has been aching for a few weeks now. She sees her urologist Dr Bedford Waters this week in Knoxville. I am driving. Can’t wait.
I am 45 years old and got my first set of keys for the car and house now.
I even pumped gas for the very 1st time last week. Kudos to me.
I have been pampered, spoiled and protected by my family for far too long.
I have even learned how to wash and dry clothes… still haven’t mastered the skill of putting clothes away. Nor doing dishes.
Dad has been in and out of the hospital for a few months. Currently he has protein in his urine, enlarged heart, COPD, pneumonia, a bum knee that needs replaced… and a case of the worst “grumpys n grouchys” in the world. His Doctors doesn’t want him doing anything but he still does some… albeit not as much as he used to. I know how tough it is on him to sit and do nothing… that contributes to his moodiness. He is rough on me and Rosie at times but we still love him.
Smoki went to Lowes today. Oh yea.. Smoki is my Cairn Terrier. He loves Lowes… and of course everyone adores Smoki. He is a doll. He wore his black leather fringe bandana today and he goes crazy when he see’s it and can’t wait till it is on him … and hates when we take it off. Went to Lowes to look for Dad a new riding lawn mower. Should be delivered tomorrow. His old lawn tractor has seen its last days. Also bought Dad a new TV 32″ LCD Plasma. He put it in his bedroom since that is where he spends most of his time lately. Appreciate prayers for him. THANKS!
Smoki My Cairn Terrier aka TOTO Dog
Then we took Smoki to Wendy’s for a Jr. Bacon Cheeseburger plain. His fave.
Smoki
Came home to a brilliant webcam session with John. He is heading to Spain on Monday with his Sis to celebrate her finishing her last chemo/radiation treatments and hopefully is now free of breast cancer. John is the best. He and I get closer daily. Known one another for over 3 years now. Best friends. I am already missing him. He will be away a week but will send me emails/text messages.
Been having severe stomach issues again. Left upper quadrant pain and other issues. IBS Sucks.
May go to the cinema to see a movie this weekend.
Praying for all my Aunts, Uncles, and cousins… as well as my friends. Been reconnecting with so many people I went to school with on Faceook. I love getting reacquainted.
Tailbone is aching so I had better finish this and post it. Heading to bed.
Rosie had her Stress test yesterday at the University of Tennessee. Her cardiologist Huntsinger just called and all is well. :-) Her heart is good and it is a go for Bariatric surgery. Woo-Hoo. Rosie is so happy. Now it has to be submitted to insurance.
Rosie has also lost weight. Her jeans were too big yesterday. She is all giddy and smiling over that. So happy for her.
I haven’t been weighed in over a week. Prolly haven’t lost any. But I am feeling more alive and beautiful than ever.
Allergies wrecking havoc on my head. Headache and blurry vision today.
Taking one glyipizide and on .6 Victoza and still going too low at around 4-6 am.
It has been rainy and fibromylagia is roaring its ugly head all over my bod. Slept 13 hours last night. See a new rheumy tomorrow. Achy all over. Exhausted.
Waiting for John to come back online to webcam chat.Already chatted once today. Poor baby has tennis elbow and is having to take a few weeks off from work. Praying for him.
Had a long exhausting day. After the doc appt’s we went to Big Lots. Got a few great bargains. My fave was Bret Michaels Snapple Trop-a-Rocka Diet Tea was only $2.00 for 6…. I have been paying almost $6 for them. I got 5 cartons and sipping on a bottle now.
Rosie made some stir-fry beef and pineapples with wild rice. I could only eat half of what was in my plate. Really filled me up quickly.
My endocrinologist was pleased with all the steps I have taken in regards to stopping my diabetic meds… and to keep on doing what I am.
My thyroid is too high. Lowering synthroid dosage to 125 mg.
Cholesterol was up. BP great. Doing an HgA1c in 2 months…
and I HAVE LOST 6 MORE POUNDS! :-)
Rosie saw the Cardiologist. He wants to do an echocardiogram on the 21st… just to make sure everything is ok. He thinks it is… but says the surgeon and anesthesiologist would rather see a test result than rely on only his opinion.
Thought I wasn’t gonna get to chat with John but he finally came on to chat. He had fallen asleep. We webcammed awhile. He looks so much better than he did last week. Finally getting over the flu. He is gonna attempt to go to work tomorrow if only for half a day. He went to the doc and he has tennis elbow. Getting a cortisone shot next week in it. We had a fun chat. I Love to make him laugh. He is and will always remain my best friend. I love him. Treasure our friendship. He says the sweetest things. I am just confused about a lot of things going on in my life and grateful for John. We laughed and cried tonight.
I wore full makeup today with False eyelashes. John loved it..
I looked at some pics of me that were taken when I was 100 lbs heavier and CAN’T believe I was that large. So blessed that I was able to lose over 100 lbs and I continue to lose.
Thankful that I am off insulin… and grateful for Victoza. I am taking .6 now. Had to come down from the 1.2. I am down to ONLY 1 glipizide… had been needing 4.
I showed Dr Langton (my endocrinologist) the rash under my belly. She gave me diflucan for it. I have so much loose and hanging skin in my tummy region. Worse there than anywhere else. Hope to have a tummy tuck when my BMI gets down to 30.
It is 2:30 am and I am off to bed.
Asking God to guide me to the man who will help compliment my life. I surrender.
I am only taking Victoza… back down from 1.2 to .6 since I have been going too low.
I was on 4 Glipizide daily.. Now on only 1 of them.
No INSULIN at all.
HURRAH! Victory. WINNING!
My current sugar reading is 106! Wow! 70-120 is normal.
I still get all the symptoms of going hypo when it gets under 120. I am use to it staying around 200 all the time…. even when I was on insulin.
WEIGHT: I don’t think the scale I have here is accurate. So I am NOT weighing myself till I see Dr Melling on Thursday. Last time I saw him I was around 224… I think… hard to remember. I know I am much lower than that now. I hope to weigh less than 215 when I do get weighed. I will be thrilled…..AND If I am under 210, I plan on celebrating with a Banana Split… I wish!
I am so shaky right now. Gonna eat a protein bar, and then go to bed.
I just realized a few minutes ago that I have now loss a total of 110 lbs from my highest weight (January 2009) I am jumping for joy. I am only 6 lbs from my next goal of 199. Woo-Hoo!!! I can almost taste it. It is scrumptious.
When I get under 180 I am planning a tummy tuck. Been researching plastic surgeons in Knoxville already. Excited.
I have many future plans which I hope to announce later this week.
Sugar was normal when I woke up then once again spiked to the 200′s and then back to normal. UGH! Still off the insulin pump and taking Victoza 1.2 and no appetite. YAY!
My friend John has the flu. We didn’t chat for 3 days but he did come online tonight to let me know he was still feeling poorly. Sending prayers to him.
I sent a private message to Stephen Fry last night about a dream I had of him and he replied! He has replied to 80% of the private messages I have sent him. My crush on him is thriving! He is so charming… wish he wasn’t gay.
I have been receiving so many complimentary messages from men online. I love all the attention. Makes me feel awesome.So many men wanting to get to know me… date me…marry me…
POISON on tour with Motley Crue and The New York Dolls! Just hope they come nearby. I will be there. I have not seen Poison nor Bret since 1994. I stopped going to Rock Concerts after my massive weight gain. I am back to my groupie weight now! Woo-Hoo. Look out boys here I come! LOL
We are going to see The Kings Speech tomorrow.
Also planning on grocery shopping.
We close our home refinancing loan on Friday. Was approved also for a home equity loan any time we wish to use it. Blessed.
Spent a few hours transferring balances on my credit cards to ones with lower interest rates. Trying to save a buck so I can get a tummy tuck and breast augmentation someday.
Been doing lots of stretching exercises. I feel pretty good right now…. BUT earlier today with all the rain I was in misery with shoulder and leg pains.
I didn’t sleep well last night. Got in only 3-4 hours. So I am planning on going to bed soon.
So many people have asked what Diet I follow for my Diabetes and for My Gastric Bypass. So I decided to blog about it.
I first eat Proteins::: Meats, Fish, Poultry, Eggs, Nuts, Cheese, Dairy, and Soy.
If I have any room left I will eat low carb fruits and veggies.
I have found that if I eat plenty of protein that I do not crave Carbs / Sugars.
Lately though I have been eating Lean Cuisine, Healthy Choice, or Smart Ones frozen meals for Dinner. Watch out for carbs. I TRY and limit my carbs to less than 30 per meal.
I also DO NOT consume any alcoholic beverages.
I eat a Low Carb ( less than 20 carbs) Protein Bar or Protein Shake for Breakfast and for my late night Snack.
BEEF Lean cuts,
* Eye of Round
* Ground beef:
* Extra Lean (96/4)
* Lean (92/8)
* Sirloin (90/10)
* Tenderloin
* Top Loin
* Top Round
LAMB (Remove all visible fat)
* Center Cut
* Chop
* Loin
PORK
* Boiled ham
* Canadian bacon
* Loin
* Tenderloin
POULTRY (SKINLESS)
* Cornish hen
* Turkey bacon (2 slices per day)
* Turkey and chicken breast
SEAFOOD
* All types of fish and shellfish
TOFU
* Use soft, low-fat or lite varieties
VEAL
* Chop
* Cutlet, leg
* Top round
EGGS
* The use of whole eggs is not limited unless otherwise directed by your doctor. Use egg whites and egg substitute if desired.
LUNCHMEAT
* Fat-free or low-fat only
MEAT SUBSTITUTES (SOY BASED)
* Bacon – Limit to 2 slices per day
* Burger – < 3 gms fat per 2-3 oz portion
* Chicken Patties & Nuggets – < 3 gms fat per 2-3 oz portion
* Hot Dogs – < 3 gms fat per 2-3 oz portion
* Natural Peanut Butter – 2 Tbsp (may use as protein choice or limited nut choice)
* Sausage Pattie – Limit 1 patty per day
* Seiten
* Soy Crumbles
* Soy Nuts – 1/4 cup for a protein snack is suggested serving
* Tempeh
* Yuba
DAIRY
* Low-fat (1 percent) or fat-free milk or soy milk
* Plain or sugar-free low-fat or fat-free yogurt
* Fat-free half & half
CHEESE (FAT-FREE OR LOW-FAT)
* American
* Cheddar
* Cottage cheese, 1-2% or fat-free
* Cream cheese substitute, dairy-free
* Feta
* Mozzarella
* Parmesan
* Provolone
* Ricotta
* String
NUTS (Limit to one serving per day as specified)
* Almonds – 15 (Dry roasted recommended)
* Brazil Nuts – 4
* Cashews – 15 (Dry roasted recommended)
* Pecans – 15 (Dry roasted recommended)
* Macadamia – 8 (Dry roasted recommended)
* Peanut Butter – 1 tsp
* Peanut Butter, Natural = 2 TBS
* Peanuts, 20 small (May use dry roasted or boiled)
* Pine Nuts (Pignolia) – 1 ounce
* Pistachios – 30 (Dry roasted recommended)
* Walnuts – 15 (Dry roasted recommended)
In place of nuts, may use: Flax Seed – 3 TBS
VEGETABLE CHOICES (includes legumes) (May use fresh, frozen or canned without added sugar)
* Artichokes
* Asparagus
* Beans, Green
* Beans, Italian
* Beans, Wax
* Beans or Legumes:
* Black Beans
* Butter Beans
* Chickpeas or Garbanzo
* Pigeon Peas
* Soy Beans
* Split Peas
* Broccoli
* Bok Choy
* Cabbage
* Cauliflower
* Celery
* Collard Greens
* Cucumbers
* Eggplant
* Lettuce (All varieties)
* Juice (Limit to 6 ounces per day)
* Tomato
* V-8
* Mushrooms
* Mustard Greens
* Okra
* Onion – Limit to 1/2 per day
* Peppers (All varieties)
* Pickles – Dill or those sweetened with Splenda®
* Radishes (All varieties)
* Rhubarb
* Sauerkraut
* Snow peas
* Spinach
* Sprouts, Alfalfa
* Squash, Spaghetti
* Squash, Summer
* Yellow
* Zucchini
* Tomato – Limit to 1 whole or 10 cherry per serving
FRUITS
* Apples
* Apricots-dried fresh
* Blueberries
* Cantaloupe
* Cherries
* Grapefruit
* Grapes
* Kiwi
* Mangoes
* Oranges
* Peaches
* Pears
* Plums
* Strawberries
DAIRY
* Milk-light soy, fat-free or 1%
* Yogurt-light, fruit-flavored, plain, low-fat or fat-free
STARCHES (use sparingly)
* Bagels, small, whole grain
* Bread-multigrain, oat and bran, rye, whole wheat
* Cereal-Fiber One, Kellogg’s Extra-Fiber All Bran, oatmeal (not instant), other high-fiber, Uncle Sam
* Muffins, bran-sugar-free (no raisins)
* Pasta, whole wheat
* Peas, green
* Pita-stone-ground, whole wheat
* Popcorn
* Potato, small, sweet
* Rice-brown, wild
VEGETABLES AND LEGUMES
* Barley
* Beans, pinto
* Black-eyed peas
MISCELLANEOUS
* Chocolate (sparingly)-bittersweet, semisweet
* Pudding, fat-free/sugar-free
* Wine, red
FAT CHOICES (with some suggested serving sizes) The following monounsaturated oils are recommended to be consumed daily:
* Olive Oil
* Canola Oil
Other Oil Choices that may be chosen (Polyunsaturated or a blend of Monounsaturated):
* Corn
* Enova
* Grape seed
* Safflower
* Soybean
OTHER FAT CHOICES:
* Avocado – 1/3 whole = 1 TBS oil
* Guacamole – ½ cup = 1 TBS oil
* Margarine – Chose those that do not contain Trans Fatty Acids such as Fleishmann’s Premium Olive Oil or Smart Balance
* Mayonnaise – Regular or Low Fat
* Olives (Green or Ripe) 15 = 1/2 TBS
* Salad Dressing – Use those < 3 gms sugar per serving
TOPPINGS & SAUCES use sparingly (check labels for added sugar)
* Hot Sauce
* Salsa – Limit to 2 TBS during phase 1
* Soy Sauce – 1/2 TBS
* Steak Sauce – 1/2 TBS
* Worcestershire Sauce – 1 TBS
* Whipped Topping (Light) – 2 TBS
SPICES AND SEASONINGS
* All spices that contain no added sugar
* Broth
* Extracts (almond, vanilla, or others)
* Horseradish sauce
* I Can’t Believe It’s Not Butter! Spray
* Lemon Juice
* Lime Juice Pepper (black, cayenne, red, white)
SWEET TREATS (Limit to 75 calories per day)
* Candies, hard, sugar-free
* Chocolate powder, no-added-sugar
* Cocoa powder, baking type
* Fudgsicles, sugar-free
* Gelatin, sugar-free
* Gum, sugar-free
* Popsicles, sugar-free
* Sugar substitute Some Sugar Free
Products may be made with sugar alcohols (isomalt, lactitol, mannitol, sorbitol or xylitol) and are permitted on the SBD. They may have associated side effects of GI distress (abdominal pain, diarrhea & gas) if consumed in excessive amounts.
SUGAR SUBSTITUTES
* Acesulfame K
* Fructose (needs to be counted as Sweet Treats, Caloric Limit)
* Nutrasweet (Equal)
* Saccharin (Sweet & Low)
* Sucralose (Splenda)
* Stevia
The following will raise you glucose levels and make you want to eat more carbs so I advise DO NOT EAT the following:
I am so thrilled that I am losing weight AGAIN! It has been almost a year since my weight has headed below 215. I had went up to 230 a few months ago. Was so depressed and distraught. Felt like a failure in all aspects of life. How could someone Fail when it came to weight loss surgery… I did…. Well it failed me. Was not the cure I had sought. Still not sure why but I only lost 52 lbs in the first 14-15 months after surgery. I believe everything that happens… happens for a reason… even though you may not understand it at the time. I now know that I was not ready mentally for any more weight loss. I feel like I am indeed ready for some life altering changes. I am all gung-ho and ready to change even more.So much has happened in the last 3-4 months in my life. I am gaining confidence. I have started to drive a car. Becoming more positive and outgoing. I am so ready to take charge of my life… instead of it controlling me… I am large and in charge… No make that… medium and in charge…. Soon to be… small and in charge.
My next goal weight is 199 lbs. I am 7 lbs shy of that now. Hopefully in a month or so I meet that goal.
Next goal for me is 165 lbs. That will set me at 150 lbs lost from my highest weight of 315 lbs.
When I make it to that goal I am gonna get a tummy tuck. I have been experiencing rashes under my belly for a few months. Have one now. It gets red and inflamed… even gooey and stinky. YUCK! It will go away but flares up again. I know that skin removal will be the only thing that will cure the infections I am getting. I have very loose flabby and saggy skin. My panni hangs low and loose. :-( Plus been having back pain lately. I bet I am carrying around 15-20 lbs of excess skin in my lower stomach area. I am gonna attempt to get my insurance to pay for my excess skin removal. Hoping to get Dr Melling to document all the issues the extra hanging skin in inflicting on me. Gonna take photos of it as well. Some insurances cover excess skin removal. I am hoping mine will and that I only need a tummy tuck aka Abdominoplasty and NOT a lower body lift ( Belt lipectomy)
I have always wanted Breast Augmentation but I think I need the excess skin removed from my tummy more. I will only get boob implants IF my insurance covers removing the excess skin… and IF I win the Lottery. :-)
John and I didn’t webcam tonight. Poor baby has a bad cold or possibly the flu. Pray he gets well soon.
So I am went back on glipizide. Sugar was 134 about 2 hours ago.
Still off insulin.
Hoping that I can stay off insulin since Insulin equates Weight Gain.. at least it has in my experience. :-(
I am just hoping that stopping insulin helps me lose additional weight and fat.
I know that some people report they continue to lose weight on Victoza but also many have reported that the efficiency of weight loss and appeitite suppression you have when first starting Victoza wears off after a few weeks.
I am praying that I continue to experience weight loss while on Victoza until I get to a normal weight and BMI. Also hopeful that being able to stop insulin will help my metabolism to allow my body to be able to use protein, fat and carbs in the proper format. SEE NOTES BELOW.
~Angela
NOTES:
The link between insulin and weight gain http://www.MayoClinic.com Weight gain is a common side effect for people who take insulin — a hormone that regulates the absorption of sugar (glucose). The more insulin you use to control your blood sugar level, the more glucose that gets into your cells and the less glucose that’s wasted in your urine. Glucose that your cells don’t use accumulates as fat. Insulin is a potent hormone that regulates glucose, fat, and protein metabolism. http://www.everydayhealth.com/specialists/diabetes/getenah/qa/Insulin-and-Weight-Gain/index.aspx In many cases, people with type 2 diabetes start insulin therapy when oral medicines cannot or no longer control their glucose levels. This means that blood glucose levels in the body have been elevated for an extended period of time. In this state, the body does not metabolize glucose, fat, or protein in a well-regulated or efficient way. Cells that require glucose to function properly begin starving because of inadequate amounts of circulating insulin. Fat metabolism becomes abnormal, which can lead to high triglyceride levels. The body’s metabolic rate then increases as it tries to convert this fat into a source of energy. These abnormalities are usually corrected when you begin insulin therapy. The body begins using glucose better, and the metabolic rate declines by about five percent. Insulin also helps the body gain fat-free mass, but on the flip side, it also helps it store fat more efficiently. Therefore, efficient glucose and fat metabolism and the reduction in metabolic rate cause most people to gain four to six pounds during the first two to three years of insulin therapy. Individuals who had poor glucose control, or who lost significant amounts of weight before beginning insulin treatment, usually experience the most weight gain.
I am down another pound. Down to 206. On the 3rd of February I weighed 221. That makes me minus 15 lbs. this month So happy.
Sugar was 154 this morn. That was without any insulin and no glipizide…. since Yesterday morn. Not bad.
I did get down to the low 90′s twice last night and ate a few bites of protein bar.. cause I was afraid of going TOO low.
Sitting here watching YouTube Video’s —- Rock Music.. I miss all those hard rock hair bands!!!!!
Listening to Poison, Warrant, Cinderella, Bon Jovi, Guns and Roses, Slade, Fanny, Queen, Sweet and more…
My Poor baby John has the flu. Had to come home from work early today. He just emailed and said he was heading to bed early so no webcam chat tonight. So Rosie and I will prolly watch a movie.
From @ButlerBlue2: Me, @ButlerBlue3 & the one & only Gasoline Alley at @IMS. -- via Flickr
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Petite Giraffe Pet Costume have your own tiny lap by hatz4brats, $60.00
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Funny Face Abby is an adoptable Beagle Dog in Albany, OR. Please contact Fran Kreger ( Fran@k9homefinders.org ), (541) 926-5629 for more information about this pet. My name is Abby, and I am about 2 �...
Gently Does It by Grant Atkinson
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Going to visit Gibralter Bay Alpaca Farm next week !!!
